Charred on the outside, raw on the inside

Yes, you guessed it.....my first "grilling out" experience happens this Sunday. I will be entertaining a group of 9 at my humble abode and hopefully not send anyone to the hospital with food poisoning...

Now you're probably thinking, of course Amanda is grilling. She's an expert with the coals and truly enjoys hanging out over an open flame -- and especially being outdoors.

If you really do think that, you either 1) don't know me, or 2) slapped yourself one too many times in the head.

Here's what will really happen -- my parents will show up at least an hour earlier than the time they were supposed to arrive. My mom will set up the grill that they gave me as a housewarming gift that's been sitting in the box in the garage for the last two weeks. My dad will make a drink and then pace ever so impatiently waiting for my mom to finish. Then my dad will take over the entire grilling process and not let me do a thing. Well, he'll instruct me for about 5 minutes while I look off disinterestedly and wonder if everyone's eaten all the chips and salsa.

But letting him man the grill is just fine and dandy. I prefer the inside because invariably what will happen in the 5 minutes I'm standing out in the backyard is that some sort of stinging flying insect will breach a 50ft danger zone I've subconciously created (actually, it's a highly specialized radar I've developed over the years), and even though it might not fly anywhere near me or have any intention of bothering me, I'll know that it's out for the kill. It's main mission is to make my face turn red, cause me to scream loudly, and make me sprint faster than the 50-meter world record holder back into the house.

Yes, this is my form of entertainment for my family and friends.

Stay tuned for a full re-cap of Sunday's festivities....